Last weekend, I was relaxing with a cold beer in hand debating the most important questions of modern American cinema with my long time friend Joe Bauer*; which Die Hard movie most beautifully captured the idea of the "unstrung hero", how James Cameron made much more of a statement in Total Recall then he did in Titanic, how Spaceballs is best watched on VHS, etc.
Our discussion led us down a very dark path with the very mention of the upcoming Indiana Jones installment. This little gem hits theatres in 2008 with a vengeance, much like Die Hard: With a Vengeance, only more subtle. My friend Joe and I both await the 4th chapter with eager anticipation, much like anticipation one experiences after a long car trip with lots of Kool-Aid and no bathroom breaks. As our movie-loving bladders fill to capacity and nearly rupture, there are still so many questions left unanswered. Very little info has been released about the film. Even the IMDB entry is skin and bones. What little info we can find is hardly credible so I suppose only time will tell.
Joe and I found ourselves heated and nearly wresting on the floor over one key element: Shia Labeouf. We know he is in the film and will play a pivotal role, but answer me this, bloggers: Will he play the son of Henry Indiana Jones, Jr.? I tend to think no, however my much hairier companion seems to think it is the only possibility. And in situations like these, what do two stubborn males with no money and no creativity do? We bet a beer on it.
Help me, minions of the motion picture. Perhaps those of you out there who actually paid $160 for a real brown Stetson or those who have dressed up like Indy for every Halloween since the age of 9 can put my mind at ease on this topic. I wish to drink my free beer not just for me, but for you, all of you. Hugs and Kisses.
*Joe Bauer is in no way related to Jack Bauer.
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My thoughts on the issue: I assume that this movie, like the past few, will be written at least in part by George Lucas. Over the past several years we have painfully observed his creative juices beeing gluttonously imbibed by Star Wars sequals/prequals (i also blame them for the exponential neck growth he has suffered). With no creative juices remaining in his ample teets, I have low expectations for Indiana Jones and the Golden Tablets of Joeseph Smith (at least I heard it was about that). Furthermore I am heartbroken by the choice of Shia Labuff or however you spell his name. It just makes me think that this will be a lot more like the 1st half of Temple of Doom and less like the 2nd half. I do NOT beleive that he will play the son of Indy...instead, he will play that adventurous student of Dr. Jones who saves Indy's life forcing Indy to allow him to tag along until he proves himself 'worthy' of his own series of movies. Sigh...lets just hope nicholas cage doesn't show up with plans to steal the constitution or some bullshit.
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